bunny.

So. Now... I don't know when I'm leaving for basic training. At the latest, January. The earliest, October. I need to find a home for my bunny. Fuck. Oh, and I need to do stuff before then too. I need help. I have soooo much to do before then. I need to find a friend that actually supports me 100% and will, like, workout with me and stuff. That would be great. Until then, beer.

Longest day in a long time.

So. I met with a Marine recruiter on Wednesday. He said that my tattoos were fine and I'd be able to get into the Marine Corps, no problem. But. I had already made an appointment the week before to take my ASVABs on Thursday with the Army. So, the Marine guy said to just go ahead with the ASVAB plans and to talk to him after the test.
So that's what I did. And let me just say, sitting in a recruitment office all day... Fuck. You should do it sometime. Or don't. It might scare you. Some of the people that are interested in joining the military are seriously fucked up. It unnerves me to think that these people will have weapons and be defending out country...
Anyway! I left Augusta in a car full of fucktards and went to MEPS in Portland. And I went to the desk and was all ready to take my test... And they said, 'social security card?' And I went to get it out... And guess what?! My recruiter in Augusta never gave it back to me. So the other recruiter that I was with and I had to go to the social security office and get a 'numi' which is like, a note saying you are who you say you are, but you just don't have your card. So. That was lame.
So I go back to take my test. An hour and a half later than the other people in my car. And I didn't study, and all the fucktards kept talking about their awesome scores and studying and blah, blah, blah.
Anyway, I got a 68. Apparently that's pretty good. I don't know. The fuckatrds scored under 50.
So then we go back to Augusta. And I sit down with my recruiter. You know, the one that forgot my social security card? Yeah. Anyway. He's like, 'So what's your deal? You joining the Army or the Marines? Because I don't want to waste my time on you if you're just going to run off to the Marine Corps.' So I told him not to, and I went to see my Marine recruiter. And I gave my score to him. And guess what?! There were only two jobs that I wasn't qualified for based on my score. Woot! But then the Marine Corps supervisor came in and looked at my tattoos and said, 'Well. That clears up a lot.' And just like that, all of my Marine dreams were crushed.
And at this point I was hungry and irritable. So I went to get something to eat. Oh! And this was also my first day driving my mew car, which is a 4speed. And I suck at driving it. I also I tried to get something to eat earlier in the day, but I got lost...
So I texted my Army guy, and asked him to save a job for me. The one I wanted (journalism) wasn't available until 2012. So I went over the list with him, and I'm officially signed up to be an EXPLOSIVE SPECIALIST. I ship out in January.
Then I drove back to the coast and had coffee with my awesome Coastie friends. Full military experience today. I'm probably forgetting a lot, but I've been up way to long and I'm delirious... So... I'm going to bed.

decisions. decisions. decided.

So, I've made my decision. My cute little butt is joining the Army. I have most of my enlistment application filled out. I just have some tests and what not to do. I'm still studying and working out ALL the time, and nothing is for sure yet, but, I'm really hoping everything will work out.
I came to my decision this evening. In the past few weeks I have tried countless times to contact a Marine Corps recruiter, but I never reached one. The local Army recruiter, however, got back to me within six hours and has continued communications throughout the last week. He's answered all of my questions, even the ones that were ridiculous or slightly random... in some cases completely random. He was honest, helpful, funny, kind of cute, and he even texts! Pretty much, he made the Army seem completely normal and not the big, scary thing I've always kind of considered it to be. I also realized that there are more options, jobs, and room for me to grow in the Army as opposed to the Marines. So really, why wouldn't I want to join?
Unfortunately, the offices are closed until Tuesday and I have some questions on my application that I need help with before turning it in. I guess I'll just see how this goes...

True friends.

So, I've tried bouncing this military thing off a few friends, and guess what? Some people can turn on you so quickly. Don't really know what the deal is with that. You would think that, even if they were unhappy with the idea, they would try to talk to me about it. But no. Just yelling and bitching.
Its like they think this is an easy thing for me to tell them. But guess what? Its not. I know that they have differing opinions. That's what makes this so hard. Its not just a passing thought. Damn it people!
I'm very serious about this. I'm looking into it and gathering information from every angle. People that love being in the military, people that hate it. How its effected their families and their friends. Why they joined. What they like about, what they hate. And you know, the more information I get, and the more I talk about it, the more I feel that this is the right thing for me to do.
I just wish my "friends" could see that I'm doing this for my reasons.

Down the rabbit hole...

So, here's the thing.... I'm pretty sure I'm losing my mind. Maybe I'm just at a high stress point in my life, I don't know.
Anyway. I'm twenty. Almost twenty-one. I have no set plans for my future. I used to think that was okay. You know, being young, letting things just kind of happen and fall into place. Not really caring about the what I do and blah, blah, blah. But, guess what? That's not okay anymore. I woke up one day and was so unbelievably depressed. Like, what the fuck, man? What have I being doing these THREE YEARS since high school? Nothing. That's what.
So, I was talking to some people a few weeks ago, and you know what we decided that I should do? You'll never believe it. Backpack to California, or New Mexico, or Arizona or some shit, and look for an old 1960s style commune. Yeah. Right. There is a great fucking idea. Every have those moments when you just sit back and think, after sitting back and thinking, and you say to yourself, "Man, I smoke far too much pot." I had one of those moments.
Some time went on, and, I remembered that I used to be really interested in the military. I never really thought about what I wanted to do or which branch I wanted to be in, so I kind of let the idea slide. But, now that I'm older, and I don't really have much else going on, I started thinking about it again. I have friends in the military. I have friends that have already served. They all seem fine. With the sign-on bonuse I could pay off all of my bills (being a drug addict has a tendency to make some bills pile up, which you don't realize until after you quit). Hell, I'd even have enough for a new vehicle. And I'd get to travel, meet new people, do different things. Not to mention, it would be a great way to get into shape. Its only a few years, and I'll learn a lot and experince some things that will help me in life.
I know what I want out of life. One day I'd like to open a cafe. Maybe work on designing clothes on a larger scale. Baking. Writing. I just want to combine them all. And the way things are going right now, thats not going to happen anytime soon. I need to just focus.
Because of all of these conflicting choices in my life, I haven't really been thinking clearly about day to day things. Hence my chopping all of my hair off after trying for months to grow it out. I don't know, I guess I'm just going to look into some more things, and, I don't know.


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